What happens after we have said “I DO”
There is so much excitement when planning a wedding, but do we take enough time to ask what happens after we say those two little words? This is a brand new reality that you face, there have been many publications on what to expect or top tips on what to do as a newly married couple.
We want to take some time to look at some of the challenges newlyweds face and explore how and what can be done to have a long lasting healthy relationship. We have asked one of our Professional Services Providers : Marica Ackermann a Performance, Life & Neuro Coach who specialises in Personality & Neurological Brain pathway assessment and as one of her services, provide Pre and Marriage counselling for some valuable insight that you can take on your journey.
As a new couple it is normal to have arguments and other issues as you start this journey, but what is most important is to ensure that the small stuff does not derail the possibility of a beautiful, fulfilling marriage. I am sure you are wondering what on earth do we mean, you are excited ready for this next phase of your life. Being prepared means that you know what to do when the little struggles shows up.
Open, honest and frequent communication
One of the most important insights and tools is to ensure that you communicate with each other. Take the time to talk, communicate from small things like how you spent your day to the more important topics such as being open about your needs from your partner, sharing of tasks and importantly how you should budget, planning your financial journey together is vital to a healthy marriage. Having conversations about various aspects of your life is a way to get to know each other better, resolve issues and most importantly to stay connected
Take time for and have a good sex life
Sex does play a vital part of the marriage relationship, so take time and talk about your needs and make sure that is a satisfying experience for both of you. If you have a healthy mutually satisfying sex life, this is the space where your will be the closest with your partner. It is important to understand that if intimacy is part of your relationship – being seen, being heard, being felt and understood this will translate into building and enjoying a strong, happy intimate sex life. If you experience any physical discomfort, ensure that you seek professional help.
Showing appreciation and gratitude
Did you know that according to research conducted by University of Georgia, published in Personal Relationships that when couples express gratitude or show appreciation for each other, it can counteract or buffer the negative effects of conflicts. According to researchers, feeling appreciated and believing that your partner values you have a great impact on how you feel about your marriage and your commitment to making it last. So make sure that you take a moment to say “thank you” and “I appreciate you”.
Respect one another
Respect is such an important part of any relationship. When you have mutual respect it shows that you and your partner are equals, no one is above the other and your voice is and opinion is just as important as your partners. When you show your partner respect it empowers them to be their own person, have their own interest and opinions. Whit mutual respect the fear of rejection or disapproval from your partner falls away.
Change things up
Life becomes a routine before you can blink, you have your day to day tasks, work, stress that becomes front of mind. This tends to mean that you may start taking each other for granted, and this you should try and avoid. Make time for date nights, take a romantic weekend when you can. When we just go through the motions we may lose touch with one another and that which has brought us to this place in our lives.
